My baby is not so little anymore... On wednesday night, we went to her kindergarten orientation - because in September, she'll be starting elementary school. I want to cry for the loss of my baby, but when I see what a fun, loving, sweet child had replaced that baby, I am excited to see who she is becoming.

So it's quite bitter-sweet.

She fills my heart up to the brim, even when she is making me crazy.


I decided I needed vacation from her for a few days in May. I took them, and then missed her like crazy the whole time I was gone. Being a mother is weird sometimes.

My girl also understands the humour of the interupting cow knock knock joke.

(knock knock...who's there? interrupting cow. Interruptin---MOOO!)

She understands it well enough that we have been suffering through a christmas filled with interrupting cows, sheep, penguins, cars, trains, cats, books, feet, elephants, ghosts. And yes, all those things have their own specific noise.




Interrupting cow indeed.

My baby is four. This happened a few weeks ago, and I think I may have been too distressed to want to talk about it. Because really, at four, I can't call her a baby anymore. She is almost 4 feet tall. She is 50 pounds. She is beautiful and strong and smart. Oh my god, she is scary smart. She recognizes my voice on the phone. She recognizes Greg's voice on the phone. She knows our phone number!

She said to me, the other day:

"Mommy, I finally get it."

"Finally get what, honey?"

"Grammy and Grampy at Daddy's mom and dad. Gramma and Poppa are your mom and dad."

"Yes, that's right."

"So auntie Regan must be Daddy's sister? And uncle Dylan is your brother?"

"Yes."

"And I don't have a sister or brother becauuuuuuuuuuuse?"

*sigh*



According to her, a sigh is not an answer. Oh well.




At any rate, my baby is no longer a wee thing, but something nice has happened over this last year or so. Suddenly my girl wants snuggles. She never used to be a snuggler. She used to push away like you were attempting a murder if you snuggled. I would have defensive wounds!

Now, she likes to climb into my lap and just snuggle. I love it. It's comforting. I reminds me that she is the greatest gift I've ever been given. Which is helpful on those days when she is not snuggle, not happy and not wanting to be pleasant.

Sometimes, you need to glimpse into the abyss in order to truly understand your blessings.


I had one of those nights.


I am so grateful for a healthy, normal child. A child whose fears are understandable, given her age. A child who will never have to face the adversity that the little girl I took care of last night had faced before she was 3 years old.

Guess who hasn't peed in a diaper in over 2 weeks and successfully made it through her first night with a "naked bum"?


I'll give you three guesses and a hint: It's not me.

Sophia theatre


Sophia: I'm so hungry!

Daddy: Really? You ate a lot of dinner!

Sophia: All the food that was in my tummy has dissolved!

Sophia is on the phone with Daddy

Daddy: Where did you go camping this weekend?

Sophia: Oh, I went to Fields of Gold camping. But there was no gold. (pause) Why wasn't there gold there, Daddy?

I couldn't find my work shoes yesterday before my shift. Our house is still chaotic from returning from the recent medieval war, and Greg went back to work for three weeks 2 days after we got home, so when I couldn't find them, I put on my gym shoes (same shoe, different colour trim) on and went to work.

Today, I was looking for them again.

"Sophia, do you know where Mommy's work shoes are?"

"Well, yes, maybe?"

"Where are they, babe?"

"Maybe.... maybe in the basement?"

I went down to the basement, and after digging around for a while noticed Greg had laid out the sleeping bag to air out. I pulled it up, and sure enough, carefully and neatly arranged underneath the sleeping bag were my work shoes.

"Fya, did you hide my work shoes from me?"

"Well, maybe yes. Then you can't go to work."

Gah. Dagger. Straight. In. My. Heart.